What was I thinking?

Honestly I have not put any thought into the babies room what the hell made me think I could carve one pumpkin let alone 4. I know I usually do 10 but that is when I am actually excited about Halloween. I am not excited about anything these days.

Actually that isn't true. I got excited about an email saying I might actually have work to do starting next week. Woo hoo - p.a.r.t.y!

I am one sad human being but honestly sitting at work reading blogs really does get boring after a while. I even tried to get Mr. Spaghettibender to give me some of his homework to do = )

You would think I would be blogging more - but I have nothing to do in my life. I am not allowed to do anything strenuous, I can't have sex, Mr. Spaghettibender is busy with school, my best friend is dealing with her own baby woes. What the hell am I suppose to do with myself? So needless to say there isn't anything for me to blog about.

I will try and do better.

Hormones

My hormones are all over the place. I feel like I have so much stuff to look into and consider and my brain is swirling. The other day I ended up in the shower crying so Mr. Spaghettibender didn't see me.

He is so focused on school that I feel like I am going through this pregnancy on my own. Then he'll do his typical scenario of chiming in once I have spent hours investigating things and making me change everything. For instance our crib. I had looked into many cribs and cost etc. I finally decided on one for Sears that was solid wood and on sale for $320. That was fine at first until he saw another defective one, well defect in the stain, that he wanted instead because it was $399 and it came with a mattress. Since we had already bought the Sears one I wasn't about to go back and return it. But if it mattered to him that much then whatever he wanted to do I was fine with. We were at the store for over an hour waiting for him to make up his mind. I was so annoyed. A fight erupted.

My thoughts. I already bought a crib so I don't personally want to return it and buy another one. If this is something he wants to do then he can go ahead. WHY THE HELL DOES IT TAKE HIM SO LONG TO DECIDE. Then he says that it has to be "our" decision. I thought I was going to strangle the life out of him right there in the crib section.

So after what felt like a gazzilion hours we left the store to go look at our previous purchased bed.

End result after over 5hrs of dragging around a pregnant person. We returned our original crib purchase. Employees at Babies R Us are useless. We found 3 stroller that we liked that were over $400. We didn't find a dresser and my feet were killing me.

All I want is to actually knock off some items on our baby list.

On a lighter note. I have two Baby showers coming up. So both hostesses asked me to get a registry together. So I struggled and checked reviews and polled friends on things I needed to place on the list. The invited went out last week and there is already some stuff bought for our little Spaghettibender = )

Congrats to the my BF!

Yesterday my best friends water broke - okay more like the drain plug came out a bit. Finally after waiting for contraction and nothing happening she went to the hospital. That is when she was induced.

When I first found out she was in labour I cried. Anyone I ran into I told and I got all teary eyed again. I went home and waited to hear from her ... I cried some more. All this crying was purely because I was excited for her.

She finally called me at 11:30 last night to tell me they had a little baby girl. Ahhh! They had wanted to wait until the birth to find out what they were having. Unfortunately because of a previously known heart defect the baby was whisked out of her arms before they could decide on a name.

I am now sitting here at my desk not wanting to leave in fear that she will call. I am hoping that everything went okay with the baby overnight. But here I sit waiting and hoping ... this is going to be one very long day.

Great

I have noticed that bad things always happen when I can't talk to Mr. Spaghtettibender. On Saturday he was in a Wedding. They had started the party early with breakfast at 8am. So off he went. I dragged my lazy ass out of bed only to plop down on the sofa and avoid doing anything. Finally I thought I should get my butt in the shower if I wanted to dry and curl my hair before the Wedding. So there I am enjoying a nice warm shower when that horrible feeling rushes over my body.

Faint, sick... I'm going to pass out.

I sit myself down and turn the shower to cool. I start to cry wishing Mr. SB was here to take care of me. Then who opens the shower door - my night in shining armour. I told him I almost passed out again. He said okay I'm staying here until you are okay. I told him I was feeling better but he didn't care he was staying until I was feeling 100%. So I got out of the shower and threw on some warm clothes.

I was feeling better - look I am walk and talking... now go to the grooms and get ready for the wedding day.

Finally he left and I finished getting ready. I decide to try out my handy new steamer gadget - which sucked ass. But while I was swearing and complaining to myself the phone rang. I let it go to the answering machine since earlier it was all telephone solicitors. It was my Obgyn. I ran to pick up the phone, thinking in my head "why would she call on a Saturday". She went on to tell me that my last ultrasound looked good, the baby was developing nicely.

You could tell there was a BUT.

And there it was but we have seen that your placenta is lying low. So we need you to abstain from sex and exercise until your 30wk ultrasound. I was stunned. She went on the say the baby was fine and all the other results of tests were fine but she needed me to take things easy until my next ultrasound.

I hung up the phone and lost it. I'm sorry but when someone tells you not to have sex for the next 10wks that sends off warning bells in my head. So being alone and not having Mr. SB to talk to I do the most ridiculous thing. I look up low lying placenta on the internet.

WRONG!

Don't ever look things up when your doctor doesn't seem that worried. I read all about bleeding, loosing the baby, loosing your own life... it wasn't pretty.

So I continued to cry. I didn't know who to talk to or what to do. I didn't want to call Mr. SB and get him all freaked out when he had a Wedding to take part in. So I just tried to finish getting ready and hope that when I finally do see him at the ceremony that I don't loose it.

Luckily the phone rings and it is him. I immediately start to cry and only get out the words the doctor called before continuing my out of control crying. Finally I calm down and tell him what the doctor said. I explain that I am just really emotional right now and it isn't as bad as I am making it out to be. Poor him. Not being there when the doctor called to ask her his own questions.

So I am still a little unsure of what is going to happen. Everything on the internet says that the placenta can move up and away from the cervix by the next 30wk ultrasound but honestly 10wks is a long time to wait and find out.

I was starting to get over the nausea and I was really hoping to start exercising again. I don't know what I can and can't do anymore. The doctor said I can do light walking but nothing to strenuous like long hikes.

Great. Now Mr. SB won't let me do anything. I lifted a tray of cold cuts at a party and he got made at me... this is going to be a very long 10wks.

Yes I am a pregnant 33yr old.

After a very, very long day we finally had our 19wk ultrasound and we found out the sex of the baby. Like I said before having a little girl would be harder for me to get use to then a little boy.

So when the tech asked us "do we want..." before she even finished the sentence Mr. Spaghettibender said "yes" she said okay we'll see if the baby co-operates with us.

She went around doing measurements of the baby and then she says to us. I have seen some things... Mr. Spaghettibender says "things" is it a boy... she says yes. I swear to you I got teary eyed. He kissed my hand and said you got what you wished on your bday.

When we left there we went to dinner at Bella's Bistro. I had a gift card that had to be used up by the end of the year and thought what a great time to use it up. Being in a tiny restaurant didn't leave us much privacy though. I kinda wish we had just gone home and curled up on the sofa and talked.

Dinner took so long that by the time we got home it was time for Mr. Spaghettibender to run off to class. His brother had called just as we got in the door so I told him he could tell him. Everyone still says - I thought you were going next week.

Ha, ha - fooled ya!

So then I emailed the ultrasound pic to my mom and my cousin. I then went through the 14 voice messages on our phone with bday wishes and Mr.Spaghtettibender ran off to school. I have no idea how all this stuff happens when we have no time to sit down and enjoy things together. I talked to my mom and then my cousin. My mom decided to stop by to give me my bday gift. Then the phone kept ringing all night. By the time I got to sit down and relax it was 9pm. By then I really just wanted to see Mr. Spaghettibender and talk to him.

His class finishes at 10pm and that hour just dragged on. I was never so excited to see him pull into the driveway. I told him all about my nights events and we talked until 11:30. I was so exhausted that I was sick... no not pregnancy nausea... exhausted sick. I said we have to go to bed - I turned off the lamp and I was out like a light. I slept straight through until my alarm. That is so unusual.

Here I am today talking about such a big event happening in my life and all I can think about is how I wish I was with my husband. Honestly I would have taken the morning off to be with him (no classes until after lunch) but he had previously decided to work construction with his cousin this morning. Can't blame a guy for trying to make some extra cash.

So now I am missing him and wishing for some time alone.

Definitely not something I see in our future since tonight we have a Wedding rehearsal party and I can't see us getting home until at least 10pm. So no stopping and adjusting for us.

Mew, I'm tired!

Don, Don, Donna...

today is my birthday... don, don, donna = )

Not only is today my 33rd - yes that is right 33rd bday but it is also my 19wk ultrasound. I have mixed feelings about doing this ultrasound on my bday.

One reason. My girlfriend found out at this ultrasound that her baby had a serious heart defect. Not exactly the news I would want on my bday.

Another reason. What if it's a girl - yikes. I honestly don't know how I'll function with that news. But I would rather find out now that 4mths from now.

I still can't believe I'm almost half way through. I hope the last half is better than the first half. I have felt better the last couple of days. Less nausea. But I am not sleeping well at all. I'm not uncomfortable or anything just wide awake.

Makes me even more absent minded.

So only 6 more hours to go!

We have a leak!

When I got home last night I realized - from the excitement of one of my fur babies that Mr. Spaghettibender hadn't feed them. So off I trotted to get the giant bag of cat food and fill up their bin. When I was downstairs I noticed some of the new concrete looked wet. As I walked over to it I stepped in something wet. First reaction - cat pee - ew! But nope it was actually water leaking out from a crack between the new and old concrete. I couldn't wait for Mr. Spaghettibender to get home and fill him in on this.

Then off I went to look at my long list of things to do before this weekend. I was hopefully that Mr. Spaghettibender would have been able to help me with stuff but from the state of the house yesterday I'm not holding my breathe.

What is a girl to do when she has less than 3 days to get her house ready for a baby shower and a husband who is determined to make things worse.

just as I suspected.

When we went to my first obgyn appointment the other day she looked over my IPS testing and said hum... then she did some calculations and determined my due date falls on Mr. Spaghettibenders bday. Just like I thought would happen. Told him on Fathers day and baby due on his bday = ) so funny.

Then we had to make our next ultrasound appointment ourselves. So we rushed home only to find out the ultrasound clinic closes early on Fridays. So I wait and waited for Monday to schedule my appointment. It is really hard with Mr. Spaghettibender being in school. I have only two days a week he is available. So once I finally get through they tell me the date - my bday! So we will find out the babies sex on my bday.

I am still so worried it is a girl. I just can't imagine having little girls. I mean if the second one is a girl I'm okay but I can't imagine having only girls. I am just not that girly and will have a hard time dealing with a child that might be extremely girly. I know, I know she could be a total tomb boy like her mom = )

So 2wks until we find out.

Until then I am planning another Baby shower for my best friend. She is due in less than 5wks and even though the baby is high risk she is doing really well. I can't wait to meet her little one. I really have to get my nauseated pregnant butt in gear and get ready for this party. I really have no idea what kind of games to play. Really do people car if they play games???

still in limbo

The concrete has been broken up and the pipes all installed. We have a bathtub but changed our minds on the toilet and vanity we wanted. Supposedly the toilet didn't have a great flushing system so that we couldn't have. It will get greater use once the basement rec room is done. So we spent my weeks holidays looking into toilets and vanities. It was SO much fun!

We found a vanity for $70 that we just couldn't pass up. It has a granite top with an under mount sink and a rounded bottom. A little more antiquey than I would like.

Kinda like this one but not all the door carvings.

Now we just have to buy the toilet - which we already picked out and the faucets and shower head. Then the plumber is coming back to hook up all the copper piping and we good to go... well not really but at least we can start the finishing touches.

On a side note Mr. Spaghettibender is back to school today. The last semester before applying for teacher's college. I can almost see a light at the end of the tunnel. I am so proud of him.

Renovations

So we have finally started to basement bathroom renovations. Like usual we forgot to take a before pic. I really don't know how we always forget to do this.

We have been running around looking for a bathtub but were finding that most of them had a really ugly front skirt/apron. So then we changed our mind and started to look at shower doors for a tiled shower. Only to discover that I wanted one the same size as a bathtub and Mr. Spaghettibender only wanted a corner unit. Back we went to look for bathtubs. Finally as of yesterday we found one without a skirt/apron so we can tile the front or add a wood panel.

Mr. Spaghettibender is all about the tub. He has to sit in them all and finally we agreed on this one.

But we will tile the front like this

then we will have to buy the toilet and pedestal sink. These are the ones we are looking at
I can't wait to see what it is going to look like finished - probably nicer than our upstairs bathroom!

welcome back

Welcome back Nausea!

I have missed you so. That week of not wanting to hurl every other minute was just so lonely. Now here you are again, coming back with a bang first thing in the morning. I know you don't want me to take my nausea pills but I have to so I can make it through the day.

But don't you worry...

they didn't work last time.

The Cat's out of the Bag

Mr. Spaghettibender changed his profile pic on Facebook to our ultrasound and changed his status to "Mr. Spaghettibender doesn't know how this happened". He's so funny. So now everyone will know - well at least people that are friends with both of us.

My anxiety is gone now that I saw the little heart beating. I wasn't all Wow I can't believe I have a baby growing inside of me but I was so happy to know it was alive. Now that people know it is making me feel better and more excited.

I just can't believe we are going to have a baby.

Honestly

What are we thinking!

Tired

I love how Mr. Spaghettibender decided to do things without fully thinking about their time schedule. You see before we have kids he wants to put a couple more coats of varathane on the hard wood floors. So since I am pregnant this means being out of the house for me. So I said he should consider do this August long weekend since we are going camping.

Fast forward to the Tuesday before the long weekend and I ask him if he's doing the floors. He says yes. I ask him when he needs to put down the first coat etc etc. Well this is when I find out he needs to lightly sand the surface of the floor and he wants to stain the scratch marks. Well that must take some time. I remember the stain taking lots of time to dry. So we talk some more and the next day he is going to start clearing out the rooms and area of the floors that need it. When I get home Wednesday night we start talking about the details some more. That is when he realizes that he needs everything from our first floor moved into the basement by the next day.

WTF!

So he had class Wednesday night and was going to go to home depot to get all the stuff he needed. He finally gets home at like 9:30pm. I try and get him to realize he can't possible move everything by himself. I also make he realize he needs to have the staining done with me out of the house due to the fumes. So I decide to take the next morning off and help him move everything.

What was I thinking??

I haven't done any activity in like 3mths. My poor biceps were trembling. I knew my butt and legs would be sore from going up and down the stairs with all the boxes. Mr. Spaghettibender wanted me to take things easy so he made me take breaks every 30mins. He is so cute.

Luckily we moved everything we ate lunch, I got ready and was at work for after lunch.

That is the day I realized my belly had popped. My jeans were digging into by baby bump - that's right I have a baby bump.

When I got home Mr. Spaghettibender had gotten the stuff done that he wanted. I knew it was going to be a long process.

In the end he finally got a coat of varathane on the floors Friday at 5pm. We have great neighbours who allowed us to sleep at their house that night since they were away. Then the next morning we got up at 6am to put on another coat or varathane while I started to pack the car.

Want to hear something funny. He was finally finished the last coat when one of our cats got up stairs and ran across the floors = O

Thankfully they were still tacky and we were able to salvage the mission. We were however very late in leaving.

Oh well, after all that hard work the floors look great. We are still living in our basement as we aren't allowed to put furniture on them for 72hrs. Which is never correct so I'm giving them another day.

Another melt down

I had another melt down. I lost it Sunday night after yet another weekend of doing nothing. That's right nothing. I am just so nauseous and that makes me not want to do A thing. My summer is whizzing by and I have nothing to show for it but a dent in my sofa.

I can't wait for the day when I can go to work and be a normal person that doesn't hide from people hoping not to hurl. I can't wait to go home after work and enjoy dinner. I can't wait to watch TV (thankfully fall season is approaching) and run or walk - I'm not fussy at this moment on my treadmill and maybe get some weight training in.

Oh, those were the days.

I can only hope that what people say are true - it gets better after the first trimester. Okay so is that week 12 or 13? I am now at week 11 and I can make it another 2wks. But if what I've read on some baby forum is correct I can look forward to these lovely feeling until 17wks or maybe even my entire pregnancy. = O

Why are we doing this again...

Don't want to hear it!

I don't want to hear how carrying a child is the best thing in life. It isn't! Especially when you wake up nauseous, work nauseous and go home nauseous. You don't want to socialize with friends because you would rather be alone to throw up in seclusion. You don't want to run errands 'cause you don't want to throw up in your car or out the window.

I really don't know how anyone can call this a great experience. My boobs are sore and huge and heavy. I am so sick I can't exercise but don't worry because the only food I can eat is pasta and that doesn't contain any calories. I have no ambition to do anything at work. Thank gawd they gave me a cubicle in the corner away from everyone so I can pretend to do stuff.

I have a doctor's appointment tomorrow and I'm hoping to be put on an anti-nausea drug. Mr. Spaghettibender is worried that we'll have kids like the thalidomide babies of the 1950s. He makes me worry so much.

I have to say that I know understand how mother that have miscarriages feel. Ever week that goes by makes me feel more confident that things are okay but I am on a message board where girls around me are miscarrying with pregnancies longer than mine. It just throws me for a loop each time.

I'm hoping tomorrow we can schedule an ultrasound for sometime in the next couple of weeks.

Chew-chew! On aboard! The worry train is about to leave!

Happy Canada Day!

Yesterday was Canada Day and although I'm proud to be Canadian... it sucks that I can't celebrate like one. We arrived at one pool/bbq party with some of our friends only to have people talk about when we were finally going to have kids. In my head "ha, suckers I'm already pregnant" But really the joke was on me as I watched them down their finally chilled alcoholic beverages = (

Then off we went to another bbq at my brother-in-laws place. As soon as we arrived I wanted to return to the first one. Where they had trays of veggies, fruit, chips and salsa. This would have been a followed by a fabulous bbq feast I'm sure. But no we were at my brother-in-laws where I saw old shrivelled up tiny hot dog all by their lonesome in a dish. They had started the burgers on the bbq as we arrived but I have no idea how long the dogs had just been sitting there. My stomach was so hungry so I said screw it and got a burger - BAD, very bad idea. The burgers were horrible. Even Mr. Spaghettibender barely ate his. Then we were supplied with chips. Lots and lots of chips.

Great, I was so happy we would be there for the rest of the evening.

As the evening slowly crept by I realized something. I tolerate his family much better when I'm drinking.

Well I hope the rest of the world had a fabulous Canada Day!

So sad

My best friend is pregnant. She is 6mths now. She just found out that her little baby has an underdeveloped heart. So she went for an hour long ultrasound with a cardiologist and it turns out her baby will need to have 3 surgery once born. She will be allowed to hug her baby and then off it goes to CHEO. Sometime in its first week of life it will have its first surgery, then a second surgery at 3mths and another at 3yrs. These surgeries are to connect the babies arteries which normally go to the right side of the heart and in this case will be attached to the left side. So the baby will only survive on half a heart.

It is so sad. I feel complete sorrow for my BF. She did everything right for this pregnancy and is completely mortified but strong for her baby. They even told her there may be need for a heart transplant down the road since it is pretty hard on your bodies heart to have to use only half to survive.

She keeps saying she doesn't want to freak me out. I keep saying I don't want to talk about what is going on with mine body/baby while she's experiencing such grief.

I wish there was something I could do for her.

Happy Father's Day... maybe...

Well me and Mr.Spaghettibender have decided to try and have a baby. Since my cycle is all over the place I had no idea when I was expecting Aunt Flo. So I decided to test to see if I was pregnant on Father's Day.

The Friday before I secretly bought a home pregnancy test and hide it in the bathroom. That Sunday morning we got up early because he had to be at his dad's for 11:30am. I sneaked off to the bathroom to do the test while he made coffee. I lay the stick on the counter like they suggested and could see the urine going through the test window. I saw a dark pink line appear. I thought to myself "that is one good control line" then I watched another pink line appear. I looked at the stick stunned. I realized the first line was the pregnancy line. I was pregnant. What?!? it said it would take 3mins - that was 3secs. I was stunned. I started to cry. I have no idea why but I was crying. I had to compose myself. I had to tell Mr. Spaghettibender.

I opened to bathroom door and saw him on the computer. His back was to me as I stood in the door way. I whimpered. He didn't notice.

I said "Mr. Spaghettibener"

he said "ya" without turning around

I said his name again.

He turned around.

I said Happy Father's Day and passed him the test.

He looked at me with that deer-caught-in-headlights stare. poor guy.

He still didn't think it was real. He thought it was a false positive. I said that doesn't really happen - false negative - yes. So I continued to cry while he answered the phone. I really couldn't stop crying. I got on some chat boards and asked other girls if it was possible to have a false positive - no.

Once Mr. Spaghettibender got off the phone I got him to call his doctor friend to see if he was working at a clinic that day and if I could come by to do the blood test to confirm. turns out he would have to do an internal exam - um, no! So he also told us that we were pregnant since it wasn't just a faint line.

So we sat there.

I realized it was getting late and we needed to get ready to go over to his dad's for lunch. We both said we weren't going to say anything until it was confirmed by my doctor. I did however call my best friend - who is 5mths pregnant and tell her. She was so happy for me. I cried some more.

It took awhile to get in to see my doctor but it was true - I'm pregnant.

Lesbian Wedding

One of my friends, who is a lesbian decided to get married in a couple of months. The only problem is she doesn't know what to wear. I asked her what she normally wears to a Wedding or fancy event. She said a dress. Well then wear a dress to your Wedding.

I have been trying to search the Internet to get her some pics of what others have worn but I'm not having much luck. The are having a small but traditional Wedding so I know they kinda want to follow the white dress theme. Maybe not as lavish as some dresses but maybe more destination bridal.

I am so excited for them. They have had some resistance from their family but mainly because they decided to do it this year and not next year. Kinda hard for the family to get all their ducks in a row during the summer and only 2mths notice. But everything seems to have finally worked it way out so now I'm just trying to give them as much support and help as I can.

I did it.

I went home after work last night and I didn't just lay around. After walking in the door I took the salmon out of the fridge and got it all ready to marinate. I then went down to the basement and ran on the treadmill for 30mins followed by some weights and get this - a pilates video. So that took me until almost 6:30 so I started getting the rest of dinner ready. Then once Mr. Spaghettibender came home we had dinner and after dinner ... what for it ... I didn't sit there on the sofa watching tv ... I know it is amazing. I did however go out into the muggy hot bug infested front yard to pull weeds. I did that until almost 9pm and then I watch a bit of tv before going off to lala land.

Let see if I can keep this up.

Tonight I'm biking home from work. Yes in this sweltering 39C heat. Maybe if I'm really lucky those thunder and lightening storms that were suppose to get us yesterday will finally make it here for my bike ride home.

No it's not too hot

It's just right ... if I lived by the ocean. I tried to make it without air conditioning but I caved once the thermostat hit 26 in the house. I just can't sleep at that temp.

Went to see Sex and the City this weekend. I guess I liked it. I will have to watch it again when it comes out on video, in my own house, where I can cry at will = )

Trying to conceive a child while Mr. Spaghettibender is stressed out by school is really not working for us. He is up until late at night and that isn't conducive to baby making. I still can't believe I am trying to have a child - what the hell am I thinking?!?

I think I am lazy. But I would really like to know what people without children do once they finish work. T

This was a typical day for me before Spring classes began. I got up at 5:45 so I can shower and make it to work for 7am. I worked an extra 50mins a day so I can have every second Monday off which means I finish work at 3:50pm. I turning the key in the door at roughly 4:20pm. Then watching either Oprah, Tyra or Ellen... just realized they are all one women, one name shows... I start getting dinner ready. At about 5pm Mr. Spaghettibender is usually home and we would eat dinner. I have no idea what I do between 6 and 7:30pm but I believe it has a lot to do with nothing. At 7:30ish I start to pump myself for going into the basement to get ready for a workout. I usually run on the treadmill for at least 30mins and then do some weights all while watching whatever programs I can find on the tv. The next thing I know it is after 9pm and I would get washed up and ready for bed. I was in bed at 10pm and hopefully asleep by 10:30 or 11pm.

Now these days I am still getting up at the same time. Mr. Spaghettibender is driving me and my bike to work so I can bike home afterwards. That puts me in the door at roughly 4:30pm. I watch the rest of the girly shows. I watch whatever crap I can find on at 5pm. I then start dinner at 6pm cause Mr. Spaghettibender doesn't finish class until 7pm so we eat whenever he gets home. That means by 8pm I might go into the basement and do some weights or lay on the sofa surfing the tv for something ... anything to watch. The next thing I know it is 10pm and I have to get my ass to bed.

How the hell is it possible that I am less active in the summer? I need a new routine! Hopefully everything will change after Mr.Spaghettibender's classes finish this week. No more having dinner at 7pm so I can eat earlier and workout like before... unless I am just too lazy.

worst blogger ever

I can't believe it has been over a month since I last blogged. So lets sum things up in bullet form

• had friends of Mr. spaghettibenders over for dinner since the last time we got together they paid for everything. Problem. The always make other plans besides us. So after spending tons of money of drinks, appetizers and glorious steaks they left shortly after dinner to go out with some other friends. I'm sorry but this is weird.
• Watch the saddest movie ever - P.S. I love you. I started crying at the very beginning and didn't stop through the whole movie. I couldn't even contain myself after the movie was over. My eyes were swollen shut the next day. Does that ever happen to you
• I have another godchild. My cousin was finally induced on her own bday and Cupcake was born the next day. She weighed in at a whopping 9lbs 5oz. I really hope I don't give birth to any baby that size. But she's really cute and her size make me less afraid of holding her.
• We are trying to finish off the renovation of our kitchen... very slow process. We installed another 9inches of insulation in our attic and we installed sod in our backyard.

That is pretty much what is going on in our lives. Mr. Spaghettibender has class every night of the week. So that leaves me at home without a car. Oh well gives me time to workout and watch tv - although that is becoming more a chore with the seasons being over. = (

Hopefully I'll have more to say to the great abyss next time.

Happy Earth Day!

So what am I doing to celebrate Earth Day... nothin'. I should have biked to work today. I should have bought local fruits and vegetables. I should have made sure to turn off lights and other unnecessary energy sucking devices. But I did/have done none of the above.

I know, I know - I am a terrible human being. I should know better but I am just so gosh darn lazy today.

Maybe tonight, once I'm home I'll do better.

I'm an organizing geek.

Hi my name is Mrs. Spaghettibender and I am addicted to software programs that can help me get organized.

Yes I am in love with all the software out there that can allow me to organize all my recipes on the computer. Why you may ask so that when we do our monthly calendar I can print off grocery lists instead of writing them all out by hand. I am so excited. My breaks and lunch hours are being taken up by recipe inputting.

Then I heard about another program that helps you organize all your clipped magazine article. You scan in the article and then you can divide them into different areas and have keywords to search them. Aaaahhh!!!!

I swear in my head I see dark clouds part and a beautiful bright blue sky appears.

I have issues I know - I'm working on them = )

What is it with his family.

Mr. Spaghettibender's dad's bday was on the weekend. He hadn't heard anything from his brothers about celebrating his bday so he called one up and asked what he wanted to do. His brother was all crusty and said he didn't want to do anything since he never does anything for his bday. Mr. Spaghettibender brought up the fact that since his dad and his girlfriend of 10yrs broke up maybe it would be nice to get him out of the house. We thought we could do something at his brothers house since they seem to hate bringing our nephew anywhere during nap time - which is conveniently anytime between 1 and 4pm. But nope they didn't want to do anything at their house. So even though we were having the baby shower the day before, Mr. Spaghettibender was working feverishly on a large essay for school and we wouldn't be able to go buy the stuff until after the shower - we offered up our house.

Since we are tight on cash, and no time to get everything and it is for THEIR dad, Mr. Spaghettibender asked his brother to help out and bring stuff like one person dessert and the other person an appetizer. His brother was pissed. He went on and on about not having us bring stuff over when he has parties - which by the way we always offer to bring things to and have. He then goes on to tell us to make ribs and other BBQ delights as well as to make sure we have beer. WTF! We didn't have any beer in the house and Mr. Spaghettibender informed him that we weren't going to make a special trip to the store to pick up beer for a bday lunch. Again, his brother gets all mad and says he'll pick up some beer and we could pay him back. Are you kidding me!... I swear to gawd he was so lucky I wasn't on the phone with him.

His brothers are so friggin' spoiled. They were never taught to bring things to other people house when they host things... why because one- their mom is rude and two - they are boys and never paid attention to what actually went on when people throw a big get-together.

So in the end Mr. Spaghettibender just told them to show up at noon - we wanted 1pm but because of our nephews nap time we had to move it up. Even though they were the ones that were late by at least 30mins.

I don't know how much longer I can deal with their selfishness.

It's finally over... Baby Shower Results

Well the Baby Shower I have been planning for the last month or so is finally over. Thank Gawd! I feel like it has been occupying all my time for no reason really. I did work really hard on hand made decorations – mainly because I couldn’t find any to match the baby feet theme we were going with.

I also worked hard creating the baby shower Bingo cards and baby animal name game cards. Unfortunately due to the circumstances we only got to play the Bingo game. You see, my cousin’s little bundle of joy decided to get ready for her birth a whole 7wks early. Due to her positioning my cousin was told to stay off her feet and she needed to get steroid injections to help the babies lungs develop in case she was going to be delivered in the next couple of days. We are hoping she hangs in there a bit longer = )

The nice thing was that my cousin came over early so she greeted guests and hung out a bit before we opened presents. We then ate and cut the cake… which was a giant cupcake since that is what my cousin calls her little bun in the oven.

Then she had to leave early for her next steroid injection at the hospital. This baby is not going to be mistaken for a boy, let me tell you - every gift she opened was a pink outfit of some sort. My cousin was eyeing diaper cakes for a centerpiece but since I convinced her to use the cake as a centerpiece instead. Then I went ahead and made one large diaper cake, a mini 2-tier diaper cake and the diaper wreath.

I was amazed at the amount of things I made out of one bag of diapers.

We finished off the event by handing out little tiny pink foot sugar cookies. These things took me f-o-r-e-v-e-r to make. I was so annoyed that I almost through the cookies across the room. But they looked cute and they were homemade so lessons learned.

There are so many people having babies that I might have to use my talents again soon…hopefully not too soon.

what is wrong with me

So I have an ongoing affliction with bladder infections. I get them all the time. To the point where every time I have sex I pop an antibiotic right afterwards to stop an infection from festering. Well I am tired of it. I hate taking pills and I hate that half the time I forget and get a full on case of UTI.

I'm curious if the infliction started when I was young and would go to my doctors office for a physical and after the urine test they would always ask me if I had a bladder infection. Did I have burning when urinating or any discomfort... no nothing. Well lets but you on antibiotic anyways.

Well let me tell you - when I finally had a real bladder infection I knew. They come on so fast that if I don't have antibiotic on hand I'm peeing blood in a matter of an hour.

So after many doctor's telling me why they think I continuously get infection I've come to the conclusion that nobody has a flippin' idea.

It has affected my life in so many ways. It is one of the main reasons I went off birth control. What was the point of being on it if every time I had a infection and took my antibiotic it nulled my birth control.

When will this nonsense stop??!!! I am tired - tired I say! I am tired of taking these damn pills.

Okay I'm glad I got that off my chest.

Happy St. Patty's Day!

I always look forward to St. Patrick's Day - I make shamrock chocolates to follow green food and drinks. I try to make something traditional to holla out to my heritage, but this year nothin'. I was just so lazy this weekend. I was tired all week and looked forward to sleeping lots but I just never felt rested.

Especially today, I went to bed at 1am and my alarm goes off at 5:30. WTF! Let me rest damn alarm - oh wait I have to come into work.

Why you may ask did I go to bed on the eve of such a great day. Because at about 10pm last night I heard a noise on the deck. It sounded like someone walking across the shoveled path crunching all the ice as they walked. I was totally freaked out. Even my cats were freaked. So I looked outside to see if Mr. Spaghettibender was home... nope, no car. So I ran to the kitchen and through on the lights to show someone was home. I then heard more ice crunching and the cats arched their back - which freaked me out more. I then remembered we had flood lights so I went to the back door and turned them on. I waited a minute or two and looked outside.

The shoveled path was too close to the house so I couldn't see from the windows if there was any tracks in the snow. I was petrified. You see as a young child I heard a noise one night that woke me up but I thought nothing of it until later on in the night when I called for my mom and some man with a stocking over his head brought her to me. It ended with me being tied up in the basement with a gun pointed to my head telling me not to move. So lets just say I'm a little bit of a scardy cat when it comes to noises in my house.

I waited around with the flood lights on for Mr. Spaghettibender to get home. He finally strolls in at midnight. I tell him what happens and he goes outside to investigate. Turns out it was raccoons. I had thought it might have been some pretty heavy raccoons but I wasn't going outside by myself to check the tracks. So by the time I got to bed it was 1am and I was exhausted from all the terror.

So here I sit thinking about what fun St. Patty's Day could have been if I wasn't so tired. If I had one drink it would knock me right out. I suck!

TGIF

I'm so bored at work today. I have done everything possible to keep myself busy until I leave at 2pm. But still the time is just creepy by. I am very excited that it is finally the weekend until I think about the long list of mundane things I have to do.

I really don't know what is more fun, sitting at work with nothing to do or puttying and painting baseboards and doors all weekend. Woo hoo - party on!

okay I might have to have some wine to make it through ... hum, wine ... I think I'm drooling.

Take a look at your past

I guess I should remover the "newly" from the blog title. It has been over a year and a half since I got married so I'm not newly married. Next time.

I just finished reading Dash of diva's blog and she was talking about where has the last five years taken you and where do you expect to be in the next 5yrs.

Let's see where was I 5yrs ago... I had just bought a house with Mr. Spaghettibender and we were in renovation glory. I wasn't married or engaged. I had finally became permanent with the government and life was pretty simple.

In the last 5yrs, I have gotten engaged, married and changed jobs. I have become an aunt and have tried to start a relationship with my biological dad again! Which I really have a hard time trying to keep the connection alive. I thought we would have kids by now but unexpectedly Mr.Spaghettibender has gone back to school so that has been but on hold. But I am extremely happy for him.

Where do I see my life 5yrs from now -with two kids and hopefully done renovations... but I've heard you are never done renovations = ) I see Mr. Spaghettibender finally happy in his new job as a teacher and me taking the summers off to spend with him and our kids. I see me moving up in my field but content with the work I'm doing.

Ah, if only things go as well as planned. That would make me a happy camper.

Snow Day

I honestly think everyone should have had a snow day today. I mean I got stuck in my own lane way - which I then shovelled. But really didn't matter because I got stuck on my street - which is a bit long for me to shovel. Then I get to work and get stuck in the parking lot - twice!

I don't think I was meant to be here today - it should have been a Snow Day!

colour confidence

After lots and lots of debating I finally picked a colour to paint. You see my fireplace is made up of large grey/brownish stones so I couldn't go with a warm colour on the wall - it just looked out of place. But I really wanted to go with a neutral brown colour so the challenge was on. I finally found a colour Antique Brown that I liked but it was Ralph Lauren. I really couldn't justify paying for the name especially if I got it and didn't like it.

So finally I picked a similar colour Brampton Tan and I bought a pint. Ya turns out I love the colour but not with the fireplace. So I picked another colour not so brown called Toasty Grey and I thought it looked so much better with the fireplace. It was not a very warm colour and since the only problem I had with my favourite colour was matching the fireplace I decided to only paint the Toasty Grey on the fireplace wall. I am so excited.

I know it sounds lame but I have hated my house since the day we moved in. You see we bought the house because it was a great deal and in a neighbourhood we loved. But honestly I is not the house I ever pictured myself in. It is a bungalow, which I detest - only my opinion. It has only one bathroom - WTF! And the whole house needed an overhaul. So finally we have some things under control. Walls opened up, fixture and floors updated. But it has been a really slow job. We start project only to finish them to the point of spaces being livable. So the kitchen is half done, same with the bathroom.

So this is why I am so happy with the painting. It just makes such a difference to the space especially with the new openings into the kitchen.

Maybe someday I'll grown to love my house.

Your not a dog.

Yesterday Mr. Spaghettibender and I were patching up some walls before we put our last coat of paint on them. Mr. Spaghettibender had made a mess of drywall pieces on the floor in which I was bend down cleaning up at the corner of our front window. As I'm kneeling there I look outside to see two teenagers - a boy and a girl and the boy is peeing in the snow... in broad daylight right across from my house. The girl is hanging onto the guy and laughing as he is doing this. WTF is wrong with this world. So I yell for Mr. Spaghettibender to take a look.

As they continue to walk down the street you can see his signature in the snow bank. I say to Mr. spaghettibender wouldn't it be funny to follow them to the house they are going to and let their parents know. He says ya that would be and flies to the front door coat in hand.

He comes back a couple of minutes later and tells me he gave them shit for urinating on his property when the kid said he lived there - doh! Yes, that was our new neighbors oldest son who decided his home bathroom wasn't good enough so he went outside. Mr. Spaghettibender says to the kid - are you a dog or something - I think your parents raised you better than that. Bahhhh!!! I just can't imagine my husband giving this kid shit. Too funny for a Sunday afternoon.

Who pissed off mother nature?!

Honestly, it is like -45 outside. As I was driving into to work I couldn't see across the river because of the fog and all the trees were covered in white frost. I did look absolutely beautiful but - come on it is friggin' cold!

I can take snow any day but this cold has got to go... come on Spring!

Can We Say Baby Shower!

So my cousin called me up the other day and asked me if she could throw herself a baby shower at my house. Kinda funny, no? She said she would pay for everything but needed a place to host it. A while ago I had asked her about a baby shower. I figure since her son is 12 she didn't have a lot of baby stuff left. She said she could afford everything and didn't need a baby shower.

O.k. so no shower then.

Fast forward to me now running around trying to find decorations for her so that she can have the theme she wants - tiny pink baby feet. She is a little out of control and unfortunately I have a funny feeling I'm going to be doing and paying for most things. That kinda pisses me off. I mean she did say she would pay for everything which is ideal since I am pretty strapped for cash with Mr. Spaghettibender in school. So we have yet to see her give me money or purchase anything other than the invitation and stamps. You think I should have bought those don't you - hell no she had over 25 invitations going out to people who live any where from 2 to 6 hrs away. I am not sending invitation to people who aren't honestly going to come because of sheer distance alone.

I know it sounds mean but had I actually thrown the party I would have asked either my mom or her mom to help me out. I am hoping that some people will offer to bring some food. That would be one less thing for me to buy and put together.


I do love the idea of hosting a party. I have already found lots of stuff for the baby foot print theme.

And how is this for a favour idea... tiny baby feet cookies.

Oh I do love planning parties with a theme!

Man it's icy

Yesterday while leaving a 41yrs olds bday party that was thrown by the guys mom , Mr. Spaghettibender slipped down the concrete stairs... ouch! He's okay though, a couple of scrapes to his hand/wrists but no bruises. He was lucky to cushion the fall and keep his ribs away from the cement.

He was asked to be a groomsman in an upcoming fall wedding for his cousin. I was really hoping he wouldn't be asked. It is just an expense we don't need in September with him back at school and not working.

I was hoping to see my little nephew on Sunday but my brother-in-law was sick and so they didn't come to the bday party. = ( Supposedly he has started to become a fussy eater and isn't wanting to eat anything that is placed near him. My sister-in-law is really worried. She thinks he is already too skinny. I think he looks fine but supposedly he is underweight for his age and height. I figure if he eats and sleeps and seems happy than stop focusing on his weight. And they wonder why we develop eating issues.

Today is family day but since I work for the federal government I don't get the day off. The rest of the city is in sleep mode but here I am at work. So weird, even the busses were on Sunday service. Kinda makes is harder for all the government workers to get into work. Oh well I guess I can't complain - we have it pretty good. I think I'll take off Friday to make up for it = )

Another Val Day gone

It was a pretty good day. I was seriously busy at work but I managed to take a lunch break and take best friend J to the mall. She was looking for bibs that say "I love Grandpa" and I knew I had seen them at the mall or at least at this place that embroiders clothes. So off we went at lunch and low and behold I found exactly what she was looking for not in one store but two stores. Her and her husband have been to over 6 stores looking for these bibs - even the same stores we found them in. Although I didn't realize she wanted a bib that said "Je t'aime Grandpapa" otherwise I would have went across the river to frenchland for that. But she had it printed at the t-shirt shop instead.

I am so surprised she is already pregnant. The tried the first month by just doing it near her time of ovulating but she didn't get pregnant so for the second month they did it every day or every other day and wham! she's pregnant. I am so excited for them. I wish I was pregnant now. I am so scared that once we start trying it won't happen and we'll wish we started sooner. Oh well, maybe I'll start a tad bit sooner and that way if it happens we'll just have to deal with it.

What is wrong with me? At one point in life I said I didn't want kids - although I don't know if that is because I always had this little nagging voice in my head telling me I wouldn't be able to have kids. You see I've had just about everything done to my va-j-j that you can think of. Ovarian cyst surgery and LEEP (loop electrosurgical excision procedure) for abnormal cervical cells. And now with me going off the pill and having very irregular menstruation cycles, what else is a girl suppose to think.

So it is now a waiting game until we start trying we'll never know.

p.s. thank you Mr. Spaghettibender for a fabulous dinner of lobster and scallops - yum!

Valentine's Day pre-game

So Valentine's Day is tomorrow and I know it is going to suck. Mr. Spaghettibender had two mid-terms today and then he has two more on Friday. So needless to say he is keeping his nose plastered to his textbooks and I'll be lucky to get a kiss... let alone any action = )

Since he doesn't actually have any classes tomorrow, I decided to plan a nice long Valentine's day for him. Every hour from the moment he wakes up until "I" go to bed he will have a present. I just thought since he will be home all day studying - insert yawn here! - that I would help break up the time with little gifts. Everything from heart shaped cookies, to chocolate, to cute silk boxers to "love" coupons = )

I know, I know I'm cheesy but hey he is worth the effort.

What is everyone else up to?

tick-tock

That's right I think my biological clock is ticking. I have family life on the brain. I want to try and conceive right now. I want to have a little baby growing in me right now. I want to dress in maternity wear and I want to start decorating a baby room. I am all over this like crazy.

But, we can't start now. Booooooo!!!!

I went to see one of my friends (who worked with me when she was in University - that's the age difference) Her little baby girl was born on Jan18 and let me tell you she is so cute and itsy bitsy. She wanted me to hold her but I said no. She looked at me funny. She was so tiny I didn't want to break her. But finally I gave in and in my head all I kept thinking was - I want this.

So my mind will be thinking about babies until we finally start trying in July. Until then I am starting to nest - which Mr. Spaghettibender thinks is just early spring cleaning = )

Nature of things in my backyard

I don't know if it is closer to predator or the nature of things.

Our little hawk friend was spotted in our backyard eating what I think was a bird and what I'm hoping was a morning dove - yes I'm cruel.

Do you like the leg in his mouth? = ) It took him forever to eat the thing though. I would say he was there for almost 2hrs.

It was so disturbing to watch but like an accident I couldn't take my eyes off of him.

Review of Untraceable

Okay so I love going to movies and I wasn't interested in untraceable until I saw a pretty good trailer for it. I read lots of reviews saying it was not even worth 2 stars out of 5. But I usually don't agree with critics - especially anyone that liked Fargo or Kill Bill so off we went to the theater on Sunday night.

When will the writers strike end?!?!

I thought the movie was pretty entertaining up until the end... when you think - come on! Look in the backseat like most human beings in your situation! So I don't think I would give it 2 stars but maybe 4 stars. It was entertaining.

The worst part of the movie - the jackass's sitting behind me comment and reiterating everything in the movie. I really thought I was going to loose it. I turned around once trying to give them the idea - shut the F$ck up but they didn't care. The quietest they were was when they answered their cell phones. The were three black teenagers with an attitude. At the end when the FBI agent survives being killed they yelled out for her to die... I wanted to take a billy bat to them. Oops, that isn't politically correct - whatever I would say the same thing to three white teenagers annoying me... but I didn't say a thing and neither did Mr. Spaghettibender - what was most surprising.

So all in all the movie experience that night sucked! I didn't pay $10 a ticket to be annoyed by three teenagers. Damn Sunday night!

David Suzuki

Would have liked to have heard his lecture last night at Ottawa U but Mr. Spaghettibender only got a ticket for himself. "I didn't think you'd want to go!" Why not ask me before buying the ticket!

I am trying to become more environmentally aware. I believe that every little bit helps so I try to do my part. I didn't run the snowblower the other day but instead shovelled the snow. Really, unless it is tons of sticky wet snow I'm sure we can handle it - we aren't 80 or anything.

Next thing I really want to do is buy environmentally friendly cleaning products. I work in a lab so I don't want to be dealing with chemicals when I go home too.

I heard there was some good one called Method that you can buy at Shoppers drug mart but then I hear that the countertop cleaner leaves a soapy residue and the same thing about the bathroom cleaners. Hum, maybe I can find a website out there that rates these products... lets go check.

Where does the time go?

I can't believe we are already the 22 of January. Where the hell did the month go.

My newest goal. To get a basal thermometer and start charting my temperature. I know it seems silly but I just want to know what is going on with me before we start trying to have a baby. My periods, I thought were become more predictable at 45days but - nah! So if I can understand when I might be ovulating that might make me feel less stressed.

It is strange to hear me take about having kids. I never ever saw myself with kids. I saw myself with pets but not kids. But whenever I picture Christmas I always picture having kids. So at some point this year we will start trying to have kids.

I am looking forward to getting pregnant and then making a must-complete-list for Mr. Spaghettibender. One in which I can't help him with since I am pregnant. Hee, hee, hee. I am so evil. But come-on I am so tired of renovations. I would rather save up the money and pay someone else to do it. I just don't want to do anymore sanding or drywall or painting.

Okay but I want to decorate a babies room. The bedroom we would use is screaming out to be decorated. I love anything I can do around a theme =)

Not that bad

I think me thinking that a Destination Wedding vacation with some of our friends was going to be horrific made the vacation better. Starting at the bottom meant there was nowhere to go but up.

So we had a pretty good time with our friends in Punta Cana. Although we never got a real chance to relax. There was just always something to do or someone to talk to. So now we are paying for it. I barely make it through the work day. I am so tired. Now it could be the lack of sunlight compared to the overindulgence we became accustom to but I doubt that.

So now I have to get back into the swing of things again... but honestly, I still too tired.

thanks for the memories!

Wow, another year bits the dust. Usually on New Years I like to think about what has been going on in my life and what is to come but ... this year I was too drunk! Honestly I don't even remember it hitting midnight. I am going to assume I kissed my husband but truthfully I can't remember. = )

Let see what has been going on in our lives this last year. Actually this year was rather busy. I was a maid of honour in my best friends Wedding so that took up a lot of my time. Mr. Spaghettibender got laid off but was already enrolled in University so that wasn't such a big deal, him going to University was. And I started a new job. Sure there was other little events here and there but that tops the list.

Now I have 3 days to go until we go away for our first ever destination wedding. I would love to take a day off to rest up but does that really make any sense to rest up for a vacation?