Normally I am all over Christmas. I have my decorations ready to go as soon as Dec1st hits. Mr. Spaghettibender won't let me put them up before that. I have my Christmas cards ready to be mailed and I am playing Christmas music and frolicking around... okay maybe that's a bit of an overstatement but you get the drift. I love Christmas. I plan a big Christmas party for my family, some people live a bit out of town and we don't get to see everyone that much anymore. I buy lots of gift and I plan a few get-together's.
But this year ... nothing. I have no decorations up, I have no gifts bought, I didn't even crack the seal on the the Christmas card box. I am pathetic. I have tried listening to Christmas music to get in the mood- but nothin'! I'm starting to wonder if my heart has shrunk three sizes this year??
I don't know what it is about this year. I must admit I have become tired of the effort I put into our social events and the lack of enthusiasm from everyone involved. It is a lot of work and money to have these gatherings and I find my family and our friends just don't seem to appreciate it. So this year I said that I wasn't doing it. Which turns out is fine because we are still really busy with other parties every weekend. But for every party I ask if I can help out and tell them I will bring something like dessert or appetizers. Just one thing to take off the host/hostesses list of things to do. I even bring a little something just them to say thank you for the lovely party and all the effort it took to plan. Why the hell do I do this? Nobody does this for me. Then my mind starts to swirl with anger and resentment. And again the grinchyness (I love making up words) of it all starts to rear it ugly head.
How on earth do I get back the Christmas spirit?
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